those cute little bud light girls.

Bud light girls. yeah everyone thinks they are soooo cool. they come in, dress in a little tiny bud light jersey and hand out the generic everyday bar prizes like coozies, glasses, beads. yeah i think they are a joke. I also think they are mostly socially awkward and not very outgoing. But maybe that's just because Ive seen about 1000 of them come in and out of bars. No I don't want to answer your trivia question for a bead, ( id rather show my boobs is i really wanted those blue beads) Oh you want to buy 6 beers to hand out, cool. make sure you tip me on that multi million dollar company credit card please. and more than 2 bucks. Yeah thanks.

                                            oh yea by the way, not all bud light girls look like this .......

So basically there was a drawing for Bengals vs. browns tickets last night. the girls let everyone in the bar enter to win, however those were not the rules we agreed upon. ( we meaning my manager) so of course I had some angry regulars when someone not so regular won. the girls were like (curling their hair and chewing their gum) "um we like didn't know the like  rules and stuff.. hahahah... giggle giggle." really. because i told you and the signs were everywhere.

Well thanks bud light girls for making my night extremely miserable. love you.... now leave my bar!

Don't call it a comeback.

I am back. I've taken sometime off, I still bar tend, I still LOVE it. (sarcasm) but really, its not terrible. Just terrible people that cant handle their booze. The worst is the people who think they can, but really they just can not.

Anyways, in my time away I've done lots of traveling, drinking, eating, concert seeing, and so much more. but i am back now to my regular blog post. (fingers crossed)

I am back to being bitchy me, serving drinks, living life, and music. Oh and the resting bitch face is real life. i feel like i always have my rbf on. 

Cheers!!!!!!

One crazy Wednesday night

So this past week was pretty interesting let's say...some girl was in the bar .. I didn't pay much attention to her but I never saw her drink .. At one point in the night I saw her swaying around, but still didn't really pay attention to her. So the next thing I know she falls down . Hard. And stays own because she couldn't get up herself... Obviously I laughed... So her friends prop her up on a chair where she pees herself.... (it's only like 1am) so she stays put for awhile and then the next thing I heard was she went to the bathroom, didn't shut the door and pisses herself again while everyone watches.....Who does that.

I tell you I ave never been so drunk I pee myself . How embarrassing . These are the things I see.. How fun it is bar tending and seeing all the fun stuff.

Lesson- don't drink and pee your pants.. I will blog about it.

yes i knwo.. ive been mia

so yes.. i have been mia.. but ive really been in this writers rut or something just not wanting to write or read .. its blah.... but im back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

first of all i need to let everyone in on this party i worked... it wasn't really my type of people to work with.. and when i say that i mean.. they dont tip even when they were getting a really really cheap drink... they also wanted to talk back to me... and i dont know if you know this or not.. i do not put up with your smack talk to me... you may speak that way to other people. but ill smack that stupid look off your face if you speak to me like im nothing.

tip- tip your bartender even if your drinks are under $3.. they Will get mad and either not serve you , or make your drinks virgin.... which i have done both..

chocolate covered pretzel

ok so here is the new shot for drink up tuesdays!!!!!!

its called a chocolate covered pretzel

mix half frangelico and half whipped cream vodka

take some salt and put it on your hand . (like tequila)

but you lick the salt first then immediately take the shot.

it taste like a chocolate covered pretzel... its sooo goood!!!!

indy bars. yes please

so while i was in Indianapolis this weekend i noticed a few things different than our little hole in the wall town usa... the first thing i noticed is they smoke in their bars.( wwhich is a downfall for me because i am not a smoker)  but i also noticed it did not smell like smoke. which was awesome.. i dont know if it was just more ventilated or what.. because i would totally notice if it were a heavy smoke... but no it was nice... another thing i noticed.. covers were everywhere. we were lucky enough to not go into a bar with a cover. we stayed cleared.  but we stopped by a one that had a 10 cover.. absolutely not.... 

we went to this sushi bar which i would recommend to anyone.. the sushi was sooooo good.and the servers and managers were great. it is called sushi on the rocks... so if you are ever in Indianapolis go there.. its soooo good. it was so clean (along with all the other bars)  .

over all indy was so much fun... the city is clean and it is not busy with cars i noticed. it was easy to travel and venture through.. so check it out. plus i heard they have the best zoo ever.
 and the hotel we stayed in gave out complimentary 'drinks' from 5-7 on fridays and saturdays.. that was super awesome....

start if something new

i have decided to start fun fact fridays!!! i think i can come up with enough fun facts to share with peoplpe for awhile. after all i am a book of knowledge. a

along with fun fact fridays i also want to do a drink up tuesdays.. this is where i will share all of my favorite recipes and new ones and hopefully people comment and maybe leave me some feedback or even give me new recipes to try!!!

 dont worry i am still having the summer blues.. not being busy in the summer kinda blows.. but at the same time its soooo relaxing and i can go and do my thang!!! hang out and whatever.. just money is sooo bad in the summer... day to day everything is different! sometimes we will be slammed one day and the same day the next week.. completely dead.  but hey that the life of a server and bartender.

well be prepared.. i will have some funny stories coming up hopefully.
\this weekend ill be going to indianoplois so ill fill you in how their bars are.. as long as i get my jack and cokes ill be fine!!!!!!

ill be better

it has been soooo long.. sorry it has been kinda busy.. weddings and stuff that i just could not get out of. so now my big summer plans are over i will have much more time.. plus its summer and that means all the college kids who usually come in and get plastered are gone.. so i have to really stretch for stories to tell. sorry if this summer ends up being boring. i promise ill find some good stories...

this story is about how at this wedding i was at recently ran out of jack daniels.. and the grooms "drink " was even a jack and coke.. how does this happen.. i mean they went out and bought more thank god,,, but thats rough... unfortunately the only moral of this story is do not run out of jack ever!!!!!! good moral right????

karaoke wednesdays

so every Wednesday for the past year i would say is karaoke day! yes i get the joy of hearing a bunch of drunks who think they are really good at singing!! and when i mean they think they are good they are terrible..well to go on with this story.... we have security like almost any other bar... we have it to protect the bartenders and other patrons. fair enough right.. well it is their job to patrol around, keep peace, and to throw the people out that need to be thrown out.. that includes underage drinking... yes if you get caught, you get tossed... well it just so happens a individual got tossed for that.. (not his first time) and his bff apparently got really upset about it... and while singing karaoke started calling our (pretty large) bouncer some very bad names. and these names include (sorry if i upset anyone, ) faggot, d-bag, m-fers. and some other choice words as he poured his drink all over the stage on purpose. (now to set the record straight we actually have had (and still do) Gay people who work for us. and when bashing goes on like this we as a "work family" get a little defensive.  ) ok now back to the story.so obviously this kid got "tossed "as well.

i am just saying when  you run your mouth, you will get put in your place... especially when you run your mouth and the whole entire bar can hear you. ( i now understand why people hate college bars) well lets just say as this kid is on his way out he trips and falls.. and obviously turned into the biggest cry baby i have ever seen and immediately got up and briskly walked away... im sure he ran and told his friends how awful we were, and he later had the balls to tweet us and call us homophobic...really dude.. i think you need a time out from the bar for awhile...

 one more reason i am sooo glad i work and do not drink.. i dont have to make a fool of myself while trying to sing!

they get it from their momma!

most kids learn a lot from their parents. such as driving, political views, mannerism and tipping.... so as long as i have worked at a college bar, just assuming these kids are on a budget or they have never worked in the industry before they really do not tip well... at all!! and when i mean not well i mean they are reaching for their .25 cents from a $4.75 drink..(thanks)  but after this last week and it being graduation weekend, i have now found out they learn it from their parents. so after serving many parents not only food, but drinks as well and them racking up $60 and $75 dollars on a tab, they decide to tip me $5 bucks... that is not even close to 20 %....

i feel like i can no longer be mad at these college kids for not tipping me, i now need to gear  my anger towards their freaking parents... why do people even go out if they cant afford to tip.. really...sometimes i really wish gratuity was added when you order 5 drinks or more....and every time i run a credit card i really need to get payed for that as well.. it is such a pain, especially at the end of the night when you have to add them all and decipher every drunks horrible handwriting,
lesson of the day! tip well. your servers and bartenders will love you way more! and if its me i will treat you way better!

its my birthday , do i get a free drink?

it never fails, at least once a weekend someone comes up to me and says something along the lines like its my birthday, can i get a free drink...always.... so my response as always is: what did you get me on my birthday? did you get me anything.. i dont think you did, so why would i buy you a drink?.  of course they get all huffy puffy and pissed off. but i mean hell i am responsible for paying for  any free drinks that go across the bar.. and if i dont know you really why would i even remotely get you a drink especially when i am 99%  sure you wont even tip me. 

on a brighter note.. if i do know you, and i like you of course ill get you a birthday shot..   or even a beer or whatever.. especially if you tip me...

why i brought this subject up is because some dbag 21 year old boy came in.. his friend bought him a shot of patron.. and of course the tool spilt a $7 shot. and immediately asked for another free one.. hell no i am not giving you a $7 shot. i dont even buy $7 shots for myself... let alone some dumb kid..so after i told him no... he got a jack and coke.. ok thats $5.25. what i cant even get a discount.. ill show you my id.. no you cant now your bill just went up to $5.75 .. 

oh birthdays!!!!

customer stupidity

me: what can i get you?
customer: what are your specials?
me: $2 natty light, $2.25 shots

customer: so your bud light  isnt on sale?

me:no

customer: whats on draft?

me: PBR, Michelob,Natty, Guiness

customer: can i get a pithcer of bud light

me: did i say we had bud light?

customer: no.

me: ok pick again

god. no wonder people dont tip me all the time.. hahaha

i am getting a dog

yes it is true,.,.. i am getting a cute little puppy...(lord help me) i finally decided i am home enough and trust myself enough to get a dog... and i am super excited... and i promise not to feed it beer, liqueur, or anything else bad for it.. i promise to walk it and clean it and make sure it poops in the yard. i feel grown up enough now to actually care for it... i hope...this dog will be the most expensive thing i have ever bought so heck yeah i am gonna take care of it..

its going to be a cute little goldendoodle.. and i havent decided on a name yet.. either Belini, or Mascato. (of course alcohol is involved in those names)... but i am super excited so wish me luck....

are you hungover or are you prego?

how do you know if you are hungover?? here are the top reasons on how to know if you are hungover and not prego!!!!

1. you wake up still drunk....

2. you have the headache from hell..

3. your mouth is so dry water doesnt do the trick right away

4. the sunlight "burns" your eyes when you stumble out of your room...

5. crying kids, barking dogs, or anything else that makes noise is 10 times louder than usual

6. throwing up (this could mean you are prego, get a test)

7. being super tired

8. you could seriously drink a gallon of anything at this point!

9. you could have loss of appetite, or go the other route and want to bash food

10. the poops..

now do i need to put symptoms of being prego. i know some of these could mean prego, but most likely if you went out drinking heavily the night before its defiantly a hangover. now if you did not go out drinking go see a doctor... you are probably prego.

ten little things

so after years of being a bartender i have decided to let everyone know ten little things a bartender wants from her customers!!! (at least me) so lets pay attention here! 10. know what you want before you come to the bar to place your order! i dont want to have to wait for you and your friends to talk about what they want.. i have other people to serve. 9. TIP... when it cost you $4.75 please dont wait for your quarter. its a freaking quarter. you cant even buy gum with it anymore. i would like that and maybe even a dollar.. tip your bartender or they will not be nice to you and sometimes will not even serve you. 8. dont ask me to make it "extra "strong.. you are going to get it how i make every other drink... especially if you do not tip.... if i dont know you why the hell would i want to make your drink extra special. 7. if you do not know what drink you ordered last time dont say that one drink... do you know how many drinks i know how to make. a ton.. so that one drink could mean anything to me. 6. if you are not 21 do not come to the bar and try to order. do not take a drink off the bar. most likely i do not know you and you are not worth me getting in trouble for . be smart and go away from the bar and drink. stupid kids. 5. wait your turn.... dont yell "HEY" and my name or anything else.. it will not get your served any faster. in fact i may take my time to serve you now.. 4. know exactly how many drinks or shots you want before i start making it.. its really a pain in the ass to make 1 shot.... 3. please open a tab... i hate hate hate running credit cards.. it takes my time up . and they are a bitch to add at the end of the night. if you open a tab means less credit cards 2. please and thank you goes a long way.. 1. be nice... dont argue with me.. chances are you are drunk and i am sober.. you are never right.. i am always right. the golden rule people. your parents should have taught you that. when you are nice to me.. i am going to be a hell of a lot nicer to you and be quicker to serve you...

its confession time

so.. beign a bartender i see a lot... and i hear a lot.. and when i say a lot.. i mean a lot.... i see who goes home with who, who is cheating on who and who just made out with who.. it doesnt matter how big of a secret yopu try to keep ot.. i know.. and if i dont see it, you better bet once the bar closes we all talk about it.... its what alcohol does to people..

do you know how often i hear stuff that i really wish i never heard.. weird stuff like how someone takes pix of his peeps, and just leaves it open on his phone at the bar so people can see it..

not to mention i see a lot of break ups and rejections.. and i see boys making girls cry, girls making other girls cry and so on ... being a bartender is pretty funny... and you see some pretty funny things.